April 11, 2007

UG dropped his body !

Docteur,
Excusez si j'écris dans ma langue, c'est mon expression correcte, je parle un peu anglais, mais j'espère que vous pourrez traduire.
Alors que je m'intéressais hier, à savoir où je pouvais aller à la rencontre de UG, Anne Newberg (Innerquest site) m'annonce la disparition de celui qui m'a beaucoup aidée car je me sentais si proche de cet être qui parlait le même langage et vouloir le connaître pour le lui dire était un voeu sincère.
Alors, je ne peux pas garder pour moi l'objet précis de mon intention de le rencontrer, car il y avait un autre sujet que je désirais exposer. Si vous êtes la personne la plus proche de UG, accepterez vous de me rencontrer ? Voici cette question à aborder. UG a soulevé le voile sur l'état de otherness / spiritualité qui n'est pas à rechercher, celui-ci, qu'il a appelé "calamité" reste, une énigme quand il se manifeste. Cette partie est-elle restée dans l'ombre ou bien UG a t-il recueilli des informations des chercheurs dans le domaine de la génétique, ou biologie ?
J'ai été aussi victime d'une calamité et après 35 jours de coma, j'ai découvert que j'étais une autre personne, non, un autre être... Je chercherai jusqu'au bout de l'extinction de mon corps, à résoudre cette énigme, les éléments que j'ai découverts doivent être partagés ils iront en complément de ce qu'a avancé UG. Est-ce possible que vous m'entendiez ?
Que mes Sincères condoléances soient transmises aux membres de la famille et amis proches de UG
Jeannine Ballweg
Montpellier /France
04 67 96 95 13

Dr.

I am sorry that I write you a letter in my own language. I speak a little
bit of English, but I hope that you can translate it.
As I was interested yesterday to know where I could meet UG, Anne Newberg
(Innerquest site) told me that UG has died. He has helped me a lot as I felt
so close to him. He spoke the same language. My wish to meet him and to tell
him this was a sincere desire.

I cannot keep for myself the exact purpose of my intention to meet him, as
there was another subject I wanted to expose.
If you are the person who was nearest to UG, would you allow me to meet you?
This is what I would like to discuss. UG has lifted the veil of the
state-of-otherness / spirituality, something you cannot examine and what he
called a ‘calamity’. It’s an enigma when it is manifested. Is it something
that remained in the dark or did UG find some research information in the
field of genetics or biology?

I was also a victim of a calamity and after having been 35 days in a coma I
discovered that I was a different person, no, a different being… I will,
until after the extinction of my body in order to resolve this enigma, study
the elements that I discovered must be in the same category, they will be a
complement to what UG put forward.

Would it be possible that you listen to me?

Please give my condolences to the members of the family and to the close
friends of UG.

Jeannine Ballweg Jeannine Ballweg Montpellier /France
04 67 96 95 13

L'ÉVEILLÉ IMPERTINENT
U.G. nous a quittés

Entretien de J. L. avec Charles Antoni qui a publié "Pertinences Impertinentes"

En apprenant le décès d'U.G et la manière dont il s'était abandonné dans la dernière étape de son « histoire personnelle », je me remémorai les instants passés en sa compagnie, il y a quelques années de cela, où déjà j'avais pressenti qu'il mettrait en application sa manière de penser à ce sujet, lorsqu'il m'avait dit : « Si je tombais malade, alors je me coucherais tel un chien près d'un arbre, je geindrais(?) et puis, ciao, me laisserais aller sans faire d'histoires ».

U.G fut à la fois un être des plus simples et des plus étonnants qu'il m'ait été donné de rencontrer. La clef de sa vie pourrait se résumer dans cette phrase : « Au milieu des épines… je marche ».

Charles Antoni

Translation:

"Having learned of the demise of U.G. and the way he submitted himself to the last stage of his life, I recall the feeling I had several years ago when spending some time with him, that he would put into practice his thoughts about this subject when he told me: “If I would get ill, I would sleep like a dog near a tree, I would moan and then, ciao, I would let me go without protesting loudly.

U.G. was at the same time the most simple and the most amazing person I was given the chance to meet. The key of his life could perhaps be summed up in the following phrase: ‘In the middle of the thorns….I walk.’

rajm@stanfordalumni.org)

Three Plus Years
Paul Arms

Just some thoughts about UG's decisions on handling his body and its nourishment in the last weeks of his life.

In the past three-plus years he had a series of health issues. It started with feelings of being lightheaded and then falling down. Two or three times he injured himself when falling, including three times when he had much pain in his leg. Twice before he had to spend almost a month at home and couldn't walk. During these periods his system seemed to slow down and he would have problems with intake of food and water, to the point of not taking much at all. Each episode led to weight loss and greater frailty. For the first time since I knew him he began to depend physically on another, most importantly Louis Brawley, who would hold his arm while crossing streets. This progressed to the point during these last months where Louis was sleeping in UG's room at night, carrying him to the bathroom, lifting him onto chairs and straightening his clothes. He was very appreciative of Louis but also spoke of how he disliked being dependent in this way.

UG fell again on January 31, in the night while by himself. He couldn't even stand and had to lay on the floor until someone came a few hours later in the early morning. He had re-injured his leg and was in pain. At first it didn't seem as serious as previously but in a few days he again had difficulty with his food and water intake. It affected his whole system and he weakened. By the end of the first week he was putting the word out that "If my friends want to see me one last time they should come now". He didn't say directly that he was going to die but all his actions pointed in that direction. He even told some friends that they should come soon because to delay would "be too late."

Many of the visitors in the next month urged him to try various ways to recover, including several doctors. He even humorously convened his "medical team" to have a conference about his situation. After an hour of struggle to come up with an answer UG dismissed them all and their ideas and made it crystal clear he was going to handle things exactly in his own way. From then on he was completely calm, utterly unafraid, and absolutely practical in his decisions about his coming end.

I had been away when he fell and returned a week after. When I first saw him I realized that he had gone down. I wasn't sure if this was the end even though he talked about dying every day. One time he said that "There is a strong voice inside which is saying 'Go, go, go!!'. But as soon as I heard that he was calling for people to see him, many whom he hadn't seen in a long time but were old, old friends, I knew that he really was seeing the end. For weeks afterward there would be hope, especially from those who just arrived on the scene. The pattern would be that they would arrive, be stunned, but still feel that UG had a chance to recover. But always after a few days the mood would change and the visitor would also feel their hope drift away.

I think that we had hope because one finds it hard to imagine that a friend will die and be no more, even though you know that to be true for all, still, especially with UG who has been the most powerful of men, you can't quite understand that he will be gone. We had all seen him suffer before and then spring back to life. For me and others who had known him most of our lives he was as familiar as a family member. How could he not be around?

Now that he is gone one can see that he handled his passing like a magnificent general, in complete command of the practical matters at hand. I'm sure that he knew right from the beginning on Jan 31 that he was going. He had even delayed or cancelled any journeys to America or India in January, something which surprised and puzzled those around.

Your question was about whether he decided one way or other his health decisions in the final weeks. He said about three weeks before his death that "UG left this body two weeks ago and he won't come back. All that is here is this body and the breath. And when the breath goes that will be the end."

I believe that somehow, in a way which can't really be defined, UG realized that his body was finished and the UG was only there to handle the practical matter of his death. From what he said there was only the body living out its course and ending in the most graceful and peaceful way. For UG there was no question of attempting to live longer or even to end it sooner to avoid any suffering.

One day I looked around and counted more than thirty people sitting in the small room with UG. Each one will have their own story to tell about those days. Hopefully some of them will come out to be known by others.

best to you Raj,

Paul

After The Storm
Bob Carr

Now what is the game plan? What does one do now? That was often what
UG would say to you, and you had no idea what to do except some sort
short term thing to do. As far as any long term happening I was alway
blown away by the reality of really not wanting to do anything that
might change my relationship to people or places or the collection of
junk called my stuff When UG suggested that I move to India, leave
America and my friends, at first I went into shock but later the idea
became attractive to me. I have been in India some time about 4 years
or more give or a take a year or so. All the time I linked UG to my
staying here, thinking there must be some reason or grand plan in the
works. Except for the fact I can live here on my meager income from SS
and live well here, that must be the grand plan.

Now my friend UG is gone, he is no more, he lives in my memory, my
thoughts about him and my meager understanding of what he is, if that
is possible to put into any frame work? That is the problem, we all
want to create a special image or definitions or a explanation that
says what he is, we are content to say he was a man? Anything else is
my image, my thoughts, put together by my experiences with him over
the past 40 odd years of knowing him. Of course knowing him, spending
time in funny places all over the world have made an impact on me, my
life is quite different from the that person called BOB. Different but
also not different, I am the same Bob, nothing special or unique in
any way. We are all the humans doing what we can to cope with what
life brings us day to day. I marvel at the mystery of what life is,
and the fact is I really don't have any idea what it is. So here I am
and I salute that man called UG. .Ramblings of a mad man.
As ever

Bob